Pump up the Jam — April 30, 2019

Pump up the Jam

I went to the mall looking for open stock pens and an MP3 player.

I was surprised they even had any even if they were 2 different models by the same brand. But I’m not stupid and was going to buy the first thing I laid eyes on. I need to price comparison the MP3 players.

When I went to the Hot Topic they were playing “What’s on Your Mind (Pure Energy)” by Information Society then “Aeroplane” by The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Did they just rip some songs off my MP3 player? It was hard to shop in there since they were having orientation.

I walked by the photo studio and I saw they had graduation photos for sale. I would like some but I’m not sure. When I wanted to ask about them the person working here was busy so I took a flier and left.

I found this really cute pen at the mall. I had to buy it.

I added a Ko-fi button to my blog. I just want to point out that it is there. Don’t feel obligated to donate. But if you want to that’s cool too.

I’m ready for a change. To get rid of all my boring clothes and accessories and get a new look. So I can dress like I look creative and then brag about how creative I am by how I dress.

10 Songs from 1999 Vol 12 — April 27, 2019

10 Songs from 1999 Vol 12

“Scar Tissue” by Red Hot Chili Peppers

“Kiss When the Sun Don’t Shine” by the Vengaboys

A lot of people misheard the lyrics of the song including Jay Leno. He heard “I only kiss kiss kiss where the sun don’t shine”. I think a lot of people misheard that lyric.

“Last Kiss” cover by Pearl Jam
This song was really popular at my high school. I didn’t know it was a cover of an old song until my mom told me.

“Where my Girls At?” By 702

They have an album called “No Doubt” and my dad used to joke and say he would buy me that one. I wonder if people really got confused and were looking for the other’s albums.

“Heartbreaker” by Mariah Carey

“That Girl” by Esthero

A good song, but I don’t like it as much as “Heaven Sent”.

“Bring it All to Me” by Blaque

I don’t even know how I recognized the Shalmar song it was sampling.

“Wild wild West” by Will Smith

His late 90s rap songs were… 😑

“Here with Me” by Dido

I think was the first Dido song I ever heard.

“Higher” by Creed

Was Creed a joke in 1999 like they are now?

Every time I try so hard I get Nothin’, Nothin’ — April 26, 2019

Every time I try so hard I get Nothin’, Nothin’

I got too emotional again. 😭
Maybe I need to reevaluate my thoughts?

That I should not put my faith in some people I only know on the internet. (the hobbyists) That they could be tricking me. My mom thinks I joined a cult or something. Too bad there are only 2 community colleges that offer a course in this in the USA. And none of them are near me or in my state.

And it is kinda like “The Meaning of Love” and “Walking in my Shoes” mashed together. Sort of maybe I don’t know. They don’t really have a lot in common other than being released on the same day in different years and being written by the same person. But when I was listening to “Walking in my Shoes”. The hobbyists might pretend to know about me or something but they really don’t.

The most important thing I’ve taken from “Songs of Faith and Devotion” is that you can’t try and do what other people did and think it can work for you. Ok so they almost broke up, Alan left, and Dave was having his drug problems among other things.

Major Thoughts — April 25, 2019

Major Thoughts

I cried myself to sleep at the thought of it. Maybe those naysayers were right. I am a failure. 😭

I’ve been trying for like 4 years now? I just wanna angrily throw away all my supplies. It was gonna be hard to get started here. Its not popular in this part of the USA. Its an obscure hobby in general.

I don’t even care about my AA. I could take it or leave it. If this was one of those deal things where a character gives up something for something else. If I was told I could graduate college, but I could never pursue my secret hobby. I’d take the never graduate college. If you would have asked me that 3 years ago I think I probably would have said college over the hobby.

And I still feel I took the wrong major in general. Not just in relation to the hobby. What could I really do with this? It was interesting to me, but so what?

I really wanted this to be my life’s calling. I didn’t even care if it was not my day job. I wouldn’t mind doing this on the side and working at another stupid deli or something.

Maybe I’m not even doomed to be a bridesmaid. I’m the delusional single woman who owns a wedding dress and hoards bridal magazines.

Oh well there’s always writing.

Time Enough at Last — April 24, 2019

Time Enough at Last

So I really thought I would have time now that I finished school I could work on my secret hobby. I was more excited about this than the actual act of graduating or school being over with. I really should have quit school when I had the opportunity. Oh well can’t change that since I’m finally graduating.

Now I have to help my parents with something which leaves me no time to practice my hobby or get good at it. I’m so pissed off! You don’t know how pissed off I am about this. (this is not about getting a job which I will gladly do)

I feel like the guy from the Twilight Zone. And if there was nobody else around I could not do my secret hobby anyway.

The Perfect Holiday — April 22, 2019

The Perfect Holiday

So I was reading somebody’s Easter blog about having their children wear matching outfits. I thought maybe that is like a parent thing since I don’t have kids. I grew up an only child so this was not a thing. And about having the perfect holiday I see this a lot in blog for parents.

Either that or some childless people get really depressed around the holidays any holidays. About how they have no children to spend it with making memories. I think about that kind of stuff sometimes, but then I’m happy because I didn’t go rushing around town looking for the perfect basket fillers or that the local store ran out of the Hatchimal my kid wanted. Then a sense of relief comes over me.

My Depeche Mode video collection arrived on Saturday. The videos for “Pimpf”, “Halo”, and “Clean” and all the “Spirit” ones too are not in this set. But this set came out before “Spirit” was released. It only goes up to the “Delta Machine” videos. It’s why I was hesitant to buy it in the first place, but I got a used copy. Ironically all those videos star Martin. (the ones not included in the set that came before “Spirit”)
When I was watching 2 different videos each of my parents commented on Martin’s appearance. I had to say to both of them separately “He’s my favorite one!”

My copy of Monument came. That book is huge! Like a text book. When I got it my mom said “Did you buy a book about those people?” I barely started reading it. I’m only on the 3rd page. The other members are barely meeting Dave. It did bother me a little that there is no mention of Martin Gore’s former band Norman and the Worms. The binding is a little messed up, but I got it used. The page that is falling out has pictures of them holding the chickens.

These were the only 2 Depeche Mode related splurge items I was going to buy. I have to stop splurging on their merchandise cause I need to buy more secret hobby stuff and that can get expensive! Well both can, but more secret hobby.

10 Songs from 1999 vol 11 — April 20, 2019

10 Songs from 1999 vol 11

“Spiders” by System of a Down

One of my favorite System of a Down songs besides “Aerials”. I like the music video for this song too. It’s so weird.

“Jupiter (Swallow the Moon)” by Jewel

“Head” by Tin Star
Does anybody else remember that song?

“Mambo No 5” by Lou Bega

I remember there was a parody Bill Clinton version and a clean version with the different Disney characters in it. I remember when it first came out they would say if your name was in the song. My name is not in the song.

“Why Does it Always Rain on Me?” by Travis

I think the first time I heard this song was on the Rodney on the Roq show then I eventually saw the music video on Are-oh-vee.

“She’s so High” by Tal Bachman

The music video is cute.

“Nobody’s Real” by Powerman 5000

I like this song better than “When Worlds Collide”.

“Secret Smile” by Semisonic

“Wasting my Life” by the Hippos

I love the use of amoebas. I think this music video is just so funny.

“Dolphins Cry” by Live

Start Spreadin’ the News — April 19, 2019

Start Spreadin’ the News

I took the day off from blogging yesterday.

Now that I’m graduating I told my mom to spread the news around to all my relatives.

I’m just so ready to move on with my life.

Ideally I’d like to start working on my secret hobby again. I’m looking forward to it even more than the act of completing college. I find that when I started it or tried to I was finally going back to college. Some of them told me to quit school before I even started which is kinda not good. The advice was well meaning? Possibly? I don’t know anymore. *Shakes head* Why was I taking advice from them!? They didn’t even know me! I still feel that in a way college was a hindrance to it. I wanted to make progress with that and not slowly inch along through college. You know my obsession with microwaving things in life. Both the hobby and college. And I would fluctuate back and forth thinking about if they were right or if I was right. The scales seemed to tip one way or the other to justify my decision.
Anyway that is all in the past now.

I gave myself and important haircut because it was important.

Drop it Like its Hot — April 17, 2019

Drop it Like its Hot

I had to go back to the school to bring my gradation petition in. I forgot to bring it on Monday. 😓😳

Before I went to sleep I thought what if I run into that girl from math class at the bus stop? I’m not going to class today and I missed yesterday.

Later when I get to the bus stop I see she’s there and think. “Oh crap! She’s here! Oh well I didn’t bring my notebook or anything.” Once I see everything is in order I’ll drop the class.

When I was walking to the admissions building I saw this squirrel. I think it’s a different one from the one that poked me who lives by the Geology building. It’s skinnier and this one lives by the school grill or cafe or whatever they call it now. It kept moving around, so it was hard to photograph but it didn’t bother me.
20190417_085644 - Copy
20190417_085648 - Copy

When I turned it in they said there was nothing else I needed. What a relief. *sighs* I was just so pumped I stupidly dropped the class there at the school. And forgot about the bus pass. Once the class was dropped my bus pass is invalid. Ok not a problem I just had to pay a few dollars to get home and that was on me.

So now I’m pretty sure everything is in order for me to graduate in spring of 2019. It only took me what 17 years of going to school on and off. Wait that is kinda sad. Ok really sad.

Why is flickr making it even harder to use?

Cuttin’ Class (it’s ok my mom knows) — April 16, 2019

Cuttin’ Class (it’s ok my mom knows)

Since I realized I can graduate this semester and the deed is pretty much done. I skipped class today. I had been phoning it in for the past week in class anyway, and doing a poor job of it.

I finally cashed my refund check, and I have plans to buy frivolous things. Depeche Mode stuff, secret hobby things, and a new MP3 player. It was funny when the banker said I was saving my money. I have to keep it there or I would buy even more frivolous things.

I’ve been in the market for one since last spring when mine was acting up. My dad wants to “help”, but “helping” is just him telling me I bought the wrong one or it’s too expensive or something. Why does he have to criticize what I buy? It’s not like he is going to use it daily.

I got another hair bow and I made a new one a Dave one. So now I have a Dave bow and a Martin one. (I also realized I never posted the picture of my Martin one)